Living in Manhattan, we go out to clubs and bars pretty often. And nearly every night, we see almost ALL the guys making the same exact MAJOR mistake when they go up and try to dance with girls.
And this mistake gets them rejected nearly every time.
Imagine the following two scenarios in a club… with two different guys, approaching the same girl… and see if you can spot the mistake one of these guys is making.
Now just for the record, both of these guys are equally good-looking and equally well-dressed… they’re just using two different “strategies” for initially dancing with girls…
>>> Scenario #1:
There’s a cute girl dancing in a club, and a guy she’s never met before comes over to dance with her. He approaches her from the back, and places his hand on her hips and starts grinding with her.
>>> Scenario #2:
Ten minutes later, a different guy she’s also never met approaches this same girl… but from where she can see him coming… and starts out dancing maybe about a foot away.
He does this for a minute or so to make her feel comfortable, and only then does he spin her closer into him for more “intimate” dancing…
Which guy do you think this girl is most likely to dance with… and which guy do you think she’ll just reject right off the bat?
If you guessed she’s rejecting the first guy… you’re dead on.
Forget the fact that he “sneak-approached” her from the back (something you NEVER want to do)…
… but this guy committed the number 1 club dancing sin – he tried to start GRINDING with her right off the bat!
This almost always ends in rejection.
The only 4 situations where you’ll see a guy approach and the girl will start grinding with him right off the bat is their either dating, friends, he’s “Brad Pitt” good-looking, or she’s just very drunk.
Here’s what to do instead:
First off, always approach her from the front. Try to mirror her dancing so you two are in the same beat, and just do your usual dance moves about 1 foot apart from her. Make sure you’re smiling.
Note: I know this sounds like such an obvious thing to say, but most guys look wayyy too serious when they’re dancing. Like they’re struggling through a long day at the office…
Smiling is absolutely KEY when dancing with girls. Dancing is supposed to be fun. You smiling will show her you’re actually having fun and aren’t nervous or uncomfortable… and you’ll make HER feel much more comfortable around you.
And remember… girls only dance with guys they feel comfortable around. It doesn’t matter how good-looking some guy is, if she feels creeped out by the way he approached her, she’ll just back away.
So… let’s rewind a bit… You’ve just approached her, and started dancing with her a little ways apart.
At this point, you’re not really dancing *with* her. You’re just dancing next to her… giving her a minute or 2 to get used to you, and to feel comfortable around you.
Now, reach out for her hand, and spin her in a drop closer to you. At this point, just keep dancing for another minute or so.
Next, our personal favorite thing to do is to spin her in closer… and instead of just letting go off her hand… just smoothly place it on the back of your neck.
When you do this, the two of you are so close that the only natural thing to do next… is to just start grinding.
And here’s something else to keep in mind:
Most girls don’t really know how to dance that well themselves. The easiest thing for THEM to do with guys is just to grind up on them.
So, usually the girl will just turn around, and start grinding with you… and you’ll barely have to actually do anything!
And this all occurred simply from changing up your strategy a bit… and approaching her a different way.
Because now, in her mind, everything the two of you do is framed as “having fun dancing with a guy who’s out having a good time”.
She’s happy to dance the night away, grinding with a guy who looks like he’s out having fun… but NOT with the “the creepy, random guy who came over to grind with her”.
Because in her mind… she sees one of the guys as a creepy guy who just wants to rub up on her… and the other guy as wanting to DANCE with her… and have FUN.
So the same hot and heavy grinding isn’t really “grinding” in her mind… it’s just innocent DANCING and having FUN.
Kind of weird, I know, but that’s just how girls think about it…
I hope this makes sense to you… let me know if you have any questions and I’ll do my best to clear anything up.
Try it out, and let us know what happens.
All the best,
The Learn Club Dance Team
P.S. Be sure to check out Turn Up The Heat – Dance Floor Grinding Secrets by clicking on “Learn More.” You’ll learn all of the hottest grinding techniques, hot, flirtatious ways of bringing in a girl closer to you, club-specific, practical dance moves you can do while dancing apart, and everything you need, to know exactly how to dance at a club.
P.P.S Keep your eyes peeled for an upcoming post on how to use your dance moves to kiss close on the dance floor. It’s going to reveal our step-by-step technique to taking an interaction from just meeting a girl on the dance floor… all the way to making out with her… all within just a few songs…. And in the meantime, check out our proven dance system to learn how you can dance at a club smoothly and naturally. without ever worrying about your dance moves again.